Just a German Girl in London: ‘You are so lucky to live in London’ #livingabroad

Hello everybody,

today’s post is going to be a bit critical. So, if you are not in the mood for that please skip this article, stop reading here and switch over to Buzzfeed to watch some cute kitty videos. Otherwise, please feel free to read my post of living abroad and the meaning of LUCK in this case. Many of you probably know that I live in London since 1.5 years. I pretty often hear ‘you are so lucky’.

Google defines luck as the ‘success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one’s one actions’ and being lucky as ‘having, bringing, or resulting from good luck’.

Well, I do not want to deny that I’m a lucky gal however, does living abroad really has a lot do to with luck? Or is it more a decision you decide to make? An action you take? Can’t the most of us simply decide to relocate to another country themselves? Fact is, the reason why I first started thinking of relocating to London was because I met a fabulous man who already lived in London when we first met. Well, things gotten more serious and after more than a year we felt an urgency to live in the same country. So, yes, I am lucky as it seems that I found my Mr. Right, I am lucky because I could experience the city on probation before finally relocating, I am lucky because I did not have to start a new life in a new country totally alone. On the other side – there were lots of moments beforehand where no one would have considered myself as lucky. We invested a whole bunch of money every months to make this relationship work, to pay flight tickets etc. Some of my friends asked me ‘How can you have a relationship with a man living in another country?’ ‘Why are you doing this?’ ‘You can’t know whether this will work out’ ‘You are going to quit your safe job to relocate and restart?’. At the beginning no one really thought I’d be that lucky – except I got some flower sent to my office. So, why do we judge people’s state of luck? Why do we assume? Why do we impose our beliefs on others  rather than support our each other?

I guess one of the main reasons this happens is that most people do not want to take actions as it’s quite inconvenient. The status-quo is so much better known. It’s tough to push your own boundaries and it’s scary to move abroad. But I believe it’s worth it. I believe the fear of failure, the fear of whatsoever hinders us way to often. And I can totally get that. I think everyone has certain fears in parts of his / her life and if you do not wanna relocate than travelling is a great alternative to get to know different cultures, to open up a bit and experience new things. While keeping everything else the way it is. However, let me warn you: travel can change your views, beliefs and yourself.

Source: Internet
Source: Internet

Another reason why I kicked off this ‘living abroad series’ is that a lot of people seem to believe that living abroad implies everyday being more fabulous than a unicorn farting rainbows, that all your everyday worries no longer exist. Where does this believe comes from? People living abroad do have everyday worries – a lot of them. I would admit we might have even a couple of more of them as everyday routines are getting shaken up, we have to communicate in another language and probably no clue where the heck we find any information about stuff we would easily know in our home country.

To just clear up things a bit I will go in the next posts deeper in what it means to live abroad, the perks and little struggles you suddenly have to face, the moments you feels lost and the moments you feel more alive then ever before.

I am more than happy to do a Q&A about the whole topic, so please feel free to drop me your questions. Lots of love, Steph xx

What is Attitude?

Hello everybody,

Stephanie (My Nut Share)
Stephanie (My Nut Share)

ever felt pleased when someone told you ‘I love your attitude’? I did, absolutely. However, I did not really know what my ‘Attitude’ exactly is. So, I thought I will need to find out. Here is what I found:

 What is Attitude?

A Definition of ‘Attitude’ by Business Dictionary: “A predisposition or a tendency to respond positively or negatively towards a certain idea, object, person, or situation. Attitude influences an individual’s choice of action, and responses to challenges, incentives, and rewards (together called stimuli). Four major components of attitude are (1) Affective: emotions or feelings. (2) Cognitive: belief or opinions held consciously. (3) Conative: inclination for action. (4) Evaluative: positive or negative response to stimuli.

OK, so, this is a lot …  let’s get a bit more into this.

Eagly and Chaiken (1993, 1) defined attitude as “..a psychological tendency that is expressed by evaluating a particular entity with some degree of favour or disfavour”. This means when a certain event is happening you will react (think, feel, behave) in a certain way.  This reaction or more the way HOW you are going to react is influenced by a more positive or slightly negative favour of reaction.

OK, so let’s look into the reactions (think, feel, behave) into a bit more detail with some examples:

Thinking: This is the cognitive component, i.e. what we believe and / or know about a certain event.

Example: I think elevators are dangerous, because the space is limited inside an elevator, it goes up to incredible heights and I have to trust in mechanics and technology.

Feeling: This is the affective component, i.e. the feelings and / or emotions we have about a certain event.

Example: I feel anxious when I have to use an elevator.

Behaving: This is the behavioral (or conative) component, i.e. the way we behave or act.

Example: I’d rather choose the stairs or I get sweaty hands and feel anxious when  I have to use an elevator.

Why does Attitude matter?

To answer this question I want to quote a page I just found and, which I think brings the whole thing to the point. Here we go:

A Good Attitude Is The Mother Of Success. Your attitude determines how you’ll be in a future situation, independent of the circumstances that present themselves. If you have a “go-getter”, positive attitude at work, then you’ve decided before circumstances present themselves that you’re going to come out on top. This powerfully shapes how you encounter different situations. The locus of control is within you, not your environment. You’ve predetermined the outcome even before the game has begun.” (For more check out: http://www.positive-thinking-principles.com/what-is-attitude.html)

Having an internal Locus of Control means you believe to be responsible for your actions and the outcomes of those. Things do not happen to you or are results of luck or destiny  (this would be an external Locus of Control) but you make the things happen! A rule of thumb indicates ‘Your success depends 10% on what happens to you and 90% on how you react’.

With this been said – let’s take action and let’s make things happen!

P.S. I DON’T hate elevators 😉